How long can a night? The noise went through the latex caps, gables and crashed through the heart, making him jump. It had already happened, but now sleep had seized upon the isolate was ringing in their ears served. Until now. Until this worm has not decided to explode. And there is no protection that takes. I do not know how long he is asleep, maybe I have not even passed the stage of drowsiness when, suddenly emerge dall'assopimento, as I had just leaned her head on a pillow with an alarm, the alarm is about to something happen. Stomp! The walls tremble. The pulse skyrocket: from now on there that takes cap. The roar of those infernal machines, run at full capacity, shuffle my bowels and my thoughts. I try to isolate myself, concentrating on breathing, trying to hear the hiss only natural that runs through my head. But now the devil possessed me, and tonight I will not have peace. They are trapped. I can not cry out my anger to anyone who would listen to me? That old man is ignorant that everything has only one sensitive to noise, that of money. Jader, lucky man, somehow manages to stay - at least until I am myself to exasperate him. I try to immobilize me, curled up in my corner, chasing desperately reassuring thoughts. But soon arise shudder: I'm cold, too cold. I have to go to the bathroom, I have to find something to warm up, I catch my breath because I lack even the air. Wrapped in blankets, I crouch on the couch clutching a steaming cup: the nerves give way, releasing tears that do not meet bank. The walls thunder, the room dark and cold overwhelms me, the whole house is going to crush me. I have no escape. Endure slavery to earplugs is not enough, now there's nothing I can do. Never be able to sleep, never be able to run, I'll end up sometimes fail to connect. Neurotic. That's how I will make: a crazy neurotic intolerant world. I make one with the couch, hoping to give in to exhaustion. Of canceled. I would like to stop the flow of evil catastrophic thoughts, memories and hold on to convince others that may join the list: I would like to heal from this hurt so I can not give a name but what is fraying. E finirà per logorare anche lui, che ovviamente si è svegliato e mi osserva silenzioso: impotente, più forte di me ma come me disarmato, inevitabilmente contagiato dalla mia disperazione. Ti prego, vieni a letto. Certo, tanto è tutto inutile. Qui o là non fa differenza. A questo punto neppure il silenzio fa la differenza: perché il rumore si è insinuato dentro di me, esaurendo le mie difese. Stringo la tua mano e lascio trascorrere le ore: la notte non è ancora finita, ma ho già paura di quella che verrà domani.
Quando, come un coperchio, il cielo pesa greve
Sull'anima gemente in preda a lunghi difficulties, And in a single circle clutching the horizon
Pour a black day sadder than the night;
When the earth change in a damp cell ,
By Hope that goes like a bat,
flapping its wings against the walls timid
and hitting his head on the soggy ceiling
When the rain spreads its huge strips
Imitating the bars of a vast prison,
And, dumb and disgusting, a race of spiders
Curtains their networks inside our brains;
bells suddenly explode with fury
launching into the sky screaming scary
What makes you think and homeless wandering spirits
What you put in a stubborn to moan.
- And long funeral, without drums or music,
parade slowly into the heart, Hope,
Won, crying, and Anguish, despotic and cruel,
skewers on my skull his black flag.
Charles Baudelaire
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